My Mid-Life Fitness Journey: Honest Struggles
I pop the top button of my trousers open after the meal. The belt, pulled tight on its last notch keeps them up, but the button's got to go if I want to sit down in comfort. Otherwise, the waistband digs into my stomach. That didn't used to happen.
I've never been particularly slender. Maybe there was a brief window during military training when the outline of my abs tried to make an appearance, but I've always carried more weight than most. Back then, it was a mixed bag. As a young soldier, I was one of the slower runners. Later, as an officer, I was still at the back of the pack during training runs. I could hit the mile-and-a-half in nine minutes flat, comfortably under the pass mark but it always meant finishing last.
A 2010 Army selfie taken on a blackberry, and a 2016 out of shape photo, the belt doing a lot of heavy lifting to keep those trousers up
My saving grace? I was strong. And stubborn. I didn't quit. That grit helped on longer runs, and rugby gave me another reason to stay heavy. That bit of extra timber kept me from being flung around the pitch.
Playing rugby at during Army training. I’m pretty sure I didn’t score from this position.
Then I left the Army and spent 18 months cycling around the world. My body shifted from rugby front row to lean long-haul cyclist. My legs turned into pistons. My upper body thinned out. But I kept eating like I was still training hard. I quit drinking, but didn't quit the calories, easily consuming over 3,000 a day. I stayed active enough, ran a bit. In 2021, I joined a running club for the first time. Ran half marathons, trail races. Surprised a few people with the times I clocked, especially given the weight I was carrying, mostly around my gut.
In China, feeling fitter and stronger
The realisation hit me about eighteen months ago: if I kept going like this, I'd only get heavier. My fitness was declining and my weight was creeping up. At the same time, life kept rolling. Work was busy, as always. I joined a gym but didn't have a routine. I'd show up, lift some weights, never really pushing myself. I knew something needed to change drastically but I wasn't sure what.
Becoming my own first client
Earlier that year, I qualified as a personal trainer. This was over a decade since completing my Sports Science degree. During the course, it dawned on me: if I wanted to help other people improve their fitness, I needed to start with myself. Be my own first client.
The first step was downloading a calorie tracking app. I'd used MyFitnessPal in the past but found it cluttered with ads and social features I didn't need. I'd been following Jeff Nippard on YouTube, a trainer who backs up every piece of advice with peer-reviewed research. His app, MacroFactor, helped me track calories and calculate the macronutrients I should be aiming for.
When I start something, I tend to go all in. For over a year, I tracked everything I ate. I dialled in my macros and ran a small calorie deficit for 12 months. Weighing every ingredient showed me just how carb and fat-heavy my diet had become and how little protein I was actually getting. Take my breakfast, for example: overnight oats, milk, berries, a couple of spoonfuls of almond butter, and a generous helping of honey. Weighed out properly, it came to over 800 calories, mostly carbs and fat. It seemed healthy on the surface. But for me, it wasn't working.
I started to lose weight. Then I set myself a physical goal for the first time in years, something achievable but demanding. I settled on running a marathon.
The Challenges
I found the hardest part of getting fit was eating well. I would snack on chocolates and drink energy drinks regularly, mindless grazing that could easily add 500-800 calories to my day without me even noticing.
The urge hasn't totally disappeared, but I've learned to work with my weaknesses rather than against them. Here's what actually worked:
Remove the temptation entirely. I no longer keep chocolates, biscuits, or energy drinks in the house. If I want them, I have to make a deliberate trip to buy them. That simple friction usually kills the craving.
Plan for the cravings. I keep protein bars, Greek yogurt, and fruit readily available. When I want something sweet, these satisfy the urge without derailing my progress. The key is having them ready before the craving hits.
Track everything, especially the "small" stuff. That handful of nuts or spoonful of peanut butter adds up fast. Seeing those numbers in black and white was sobering and motivating.
Find your trigger times. Mine were mid-afternoon energy slumps and evening Netflix sessions. Once I identified the patterns, I could prepare alternatives: green tea and almonds in the afternoon, herbal tea or a grapefruit in the evening.
Having a bigger goal, the marathon, also helped. It's harder to justify sabotaging tomorrow's training run for today's chocolate bar. The daily tracking really helped to make the difference, but only when combined with these practical strategies.
The Transformation
The benefits go far beyond being physically "fit". Since taking my eating and fitness seriously, I've lost just over 17kg (37lb or 2.6 stone). Losing this amount of weight has brought me close to the healthy bracket of my BMI for the first time since I was a teenager. This is the same system I now use to coach other men, not just for weight loss, but for rebuilding energy, structure, and clarity across their whole life.
My feet no longer ache when I get out of bed. I sleep easier and deeper. I have gone from occasionally snoring to never snoring.
Mentally, I'm sharper. I have more energy to be present with friends and family. My confidence and self-esteem have risen and that flows into every other part of life.
Buying clothes has become easier. I no longer need to pop the top button on my jeans. I don't feel as self conscious about my "man boobs".
Sep 2024 weighing 97.2kg and July 2025 wighing 79.5kg
The Marathon Goal
I'm currently 9 weeks into a 17-week marathon training plan using the Runna app. So far, I'm on track and feeling strong. The plan has me running 4-5 times a week, covering about 60-70km weekly. It syncs with my smartwatch so I can leave my phone at home. It removes the guesswork, I just follow the plan. Whether I'll cross the finish line in the time I'm hoping for remains to be seen, but the process itself has been transformative.
Final Thoughts: Embracing the Journey
Getting fit in midlife means embracing rest and recovery. It means being gentle in the gym, not just flinging weights around like a 17-year-old who's just discovered CrossFit. It's about being intentional with each movement. Lifting with intensity and control.
The biggest gains I've made both in the gym and on the trail have come from consistency. I weight train 3–4 times a week, for 45 minutes a session. The routine has become as natural as brushing my teeth.
There's no end goal. Even the marathon is just a marker along the way.
The real goal? To live fully. To be present. To take care of the only body I'll ever have. To keep doing the things I love: hiking, running, cycling, swimming, climbing and to keep moving, with purpose and joy.
What I'd Tell My Past Self (And Maybe You)
If you're where I was eighteen months ago, uncomfortable in your own skin, knowing something needs to change but not sure where to start, here's what actually moves the needle:
Start with one app and one habit. Download a calorie tracker (I recommend MacroFactor) and commit to logging everything for just one week. Don't worry about changing what you eat yet, just see where you actually stand.
Clear your environment. Remove the foods that sabotage you from easy reach. Stock up on the alternatives before you need them.
Find your non-negotiables. For me, it's 3-4 gym sessions per week and following my running plan. Pick 2-3 activities you can realistically maintain and protect that time fiercely.
Set one meaningful goal. Not "get fit" or "lose weight", something specific that excites and scares you a little. A race, a hiking challenge, a strength milestone.
Show up somewhere regularly. Join a group, find a gym buddy, or commit to a class. Accountability happens in community, even if you're naturally solitary like me.
Measure what matters. Weight is just one metric. Track how you feel getting out of bed, your energy levels, how clothes fit, your sleep quality. These changes often come before the scale moves.
There's never a perfect time to start. There will always be work stress, family demands, or some reason to delay. But the compound effect of small, consistent actions over months and years? That's where the real magic happens.
Thinking About Making a Change?
If any of this hits home, the tight waistband, the creeping weight, the constant low-level stress, I get it. I’ve lived it.
But here’s what I’ve learned:
Getting your body in shape is just the beginning.
The real transformation comes when you build structure into your whole life, your routines, your mindset, your work, your direction.
That’s what I offer through Stronger Without:
Private coaching for men ready to lead themselves again, in body, in business, and in the quiet moments in between.
This isn’t a fitness programme.
It’s a full reset.
We’ll work together to:
Rebuild structure where things have slipped
Regain strength - physical and mental
Cut through distraction and get clear on what really matters
Create systems that work for your life, not someone else’s
If you’re ready to stop drifting and start showing up fully, for yourself, your work, your people, I’d be honoured to coach you through that process.
👉 Click here to learn more about coaching
Or just reply to this email. Let’s talk.
